Blog Drama: Is It Worth It?
I figured the post I did about my project would get a nice response; I was floored by what ensued. Was it worth the drama? Here’s a little FAQ with myself.
What exactly were you thinking when you came up with your project?
I happened to notice a couple of people using the word “retard” on Twitter. Then I set up an alert for the word ” and I was floored. I was thinking I’d raise some awareness by tweeting at some people who used it. I wasn’t hoping I could single-handedly eradicate it—but I figured I could use the powers of social media to make a dent. I wanted to stir things up.
So tell the people what happened.
I tweeted at people for a few days. As I was writing about my experiences, I decided to show some of the more obnoxious tweets I got. So I did screen shots, blurring out people’s names. Then I thought, LAWSUIT! So I checked in with an attorney pal to make sure I wouldn’t lose my home/blog/shoe collection. She gave me the green light, and I put up the post.
And then?
It went viral—people were Tweeting it and posting it on Facebook. My blog got close to 14,000 visitors in one day, which is a whole lot of traffic for my blog. The post got picked up by ParentDish and ended up on AOL’s homepage. A blogger at Glamour.com (where I used to work) wrote about my project, and her post made it onto Yahoo Shine’s homepage.
What sort of comments did you get?
The ones on my blog were mostly thoughtful and encouraging, although there were a few comments such as, “Have you got in touch with furniture manufacturers to get them to change the name of their fire retardant fabrics?” The ones on AOL and elsewhere were mostly negative. People were downright defensive about using the word. A bunch claimed freedom of speech and said it was a perfectly fine word to use as long as it wasn’t directed toward a person with disabilities. Some pointed out that the word “retard” can also mean to slow down and therefore shouldn’t be eradicated, which was completely off point. Some told me to stop playing word police and being so p.c. It was as if I’d asked people to stop eating donuts or something, instead of asking them to be sensitive to a word that’s painful to some people.
What was especially annoying?
The particularly clueless responses. Someone said I must have too much time on my hands to have done this project. Someone else said I needed to quit being so overly protective of my child. Someone referred to me as a “Sad little woman.” Sad little woman my ass.
How did you deal?
I quit reading the comments, although I wrote out one on a post-it and put it up on my bathroom mirror: “The depth of people’s ignorance coupled with their vast lack of empathy never ceases to amaze me.” And I got the new Email Their Mothers! app, which notifies moms when their offspring leave nasty comments on other people’s blogs.
What have the lasting effects been?
I’m still getting emails and the occasional tweet and Facebook message that people have reconsidered using that word. It’s only been a few weeks since I wrote the post, but my traffic is still way up—I’ve gotten a whole new group of readers on the blog, ones I can inspire and who in return can inspire me. Of course I didn’t eradicate the word; who could do that? But I changed some minds out there. I got a discussion going.
So was it all worth it?
Oh, yeah.
What lesson do you think people could learn from what you did?
If you want to raise awareness for a cause, cook up something a little different than the usual blog post.
Do you often talk to yourself?
No. Because I am not a sad little woman.
If you decide to form a “sad little woman” network can I join? :)
Seriously, as the mother of a wonderful young man who struggles with Autism as his life challenge, I’m grateful to you for reminding people that words, they can wound & cause pain.
Good for you! I do not like to hear that word used at all. And I cannot believe someone called you a sad little woman. Some people are so ignorant.
I totally remember when you posted about this. That one person who you actually ended up having that discourse with was fantastic! I explained to my boys about the word, and they’re little so don’t use it anyhow, but I felt I needed to do my part and tell them!! I still think it’s a vital topic just like calling someone a “fag” or a “towel head” (if that’s the right terminology) or anything else. It’s a reflection on a group of people that’s turned into a negative connotation. You Go Girl!!
Ditto to what I said earlier. This time with a face and link attached (I hope)
very strange
Good for you for taking a stand on something you believe strongly in. And the PR move was brilliant if you ask me!!!
I agree with others that this is not what I think of when I think of “drama”. I have little interest in or patience for petty back and forths between bloggers. Asking tough questions, raising awareness, getting the conversation started…isn’t that a big part of what this whole social media thing is supposed to be about?
I’m not a fan of the people who start fights online. Or people who are overly judge-y about how other people act/blog/tweet/Facebook. I wonder why these people have so much time on their hands that they can micromanage others.
Loved your posts and tweets and responses to some of the wackadoo tweets. You had a couple of people who could probably justify anything….no matter how outrageous.
Thanks, everyone, for the encouraging words! Tanyetta: Shoe collection is alive and well and experiencing spring fever.
I’m aligned with Kimberly / Mom in the City, above. Drama for it’s own sake is a little pathetic and can (and should) damage the brand of the blogger’s website. However what Ellen did was brave and had an actual purpose.
Ellen probably guessed that it would cause a stir, but couldn’t predict how much traffic and PR would result on the positive end, and certainly wouldn’t have guessed how much pain she would suffer in the process.
It’s pretty easy to sniff out manufactured drama, which gets stale pretty quickly.
I run a finance site for women called FinancialRx.com, and my goal is to deliver neutral, straightforward useful information about a wide range of money-related topics, so drama probably doesn’t have much of a role there. But on a blogger site like this, raising controversial questions certainly has it’s place.
Way to go Ellen!
Good for you! The drama is definitely worth it. It’s too bad that some people can’t respect others’ views.
I’m with Kim. This isn’t blog drama. This is an awesome exercise in consciousness-raising. Go Ellen!
I just want to know if the shoe collection is OK! :-)
There’s drama and then there’s drama. Your blog drama was admirable/for a cause. Bloggers who constantly poke online fights/always get in the midst of the latest bloggy drama -not so much. Those drama queens are the ones that I delete from my blog reader/twitter account/etc. I just can’t deal with constant negativity. Life is too short.
Ellen, I thought the campaign you launched was incredible, and I was/am SO proud of you! Definitely “drama” worth standing by.